CHICAGO, Illinois (PNN) - August 31, 2014 - In what may be one of the most mind-bogglingly surreal experiments ever floated, scientists at the Fascist Police States of Amerika Department of Energy's Fermi National Accelerator Laboratory (Fermilab) will attempt to discover if the universe is "real" or merely a holographic 3-D illusion that we just think is real. Using high-powered lasers, the scientists intend to determine if space-time is a quantum system made up of countless tiny bits of information.

NEW YORK (PNN) - August 30, 2014 - Despite a federal court order directing Microsoft to turn overseas-held email data to fascist federal authorities, the software giant said Friday it will continue to withhold that information as it waits for the case to wind through the appeals process. The judge has now ordered both Microsoft and federal prosecutors to advise her how to proceed by next Friday, September 5.

MOSCOW, Russia (PNN) - August 26, 2014 - Russian cosmonauts have discovered something remarkable clinging to the outside of the International Space Station: living organisms.

The microscopic creatures appeared during a space walk intended to clean the vessel's surface, and were allegedly identified - incredibly - as a type of sea plankton. According to Sploid, Russian scientists are both "shocked by [the] discovery and can't really explain how [it] is possible."

EDINBOROUGH, Scotland (PNN) - August 25, 2014 - Scotland's referendum on independence - a vote to decide whether Scotland should stay in the United Kingdom or secede - is less than one month away. The political leaders of each side will participate in the last televised debate before the Sept. 18 referendum on Monday night. Here's what you need to know.

SUFFIELD, Connecticut (PNN) - August 22, 2014 - Even in the wake of a town-issued cease-and-desist order, Kathleen Mormino - the self-proclaimed “Chicken Chick” - isn’t about to give up her chickens despite not possessing the required acreage on which to raise them.

NEW YORK (PNN) - August 14, 2014 - According to a new report that looks at how continuing improvements to artificial intelligence and robotics will impact society, “robotic sex partners will become commonplace” by 2025. A large portion of the report also focuses on how AI and robotics will impact both blue- and white-collar workers, with about 50% of the polled experts stating that robots will displace more human jobs than they create by 2025.

CINCINNATI, Ohio (PNN) - August 5, 2014 - Terrorist pig thug officials in Cincinnati, Ohio, were tired of seeing prostitutes take over parts of the city. The city council's solution to the problem was to put up barriers that block off key roads. Although the city recently backed down in the light of a resident revolt, terrorist pig thug officials released a report Monday trumpeting the blockade's success.

LONDON, England (PNN) - August 5, 2014 - An entrepreneur has gambled his home on building a toll road after becoming frustrated at council delays in clearing a commuter route blocked by a landslip.

Mike Watts is charging motorists £2 per journey to use his bypass made from rolled chippings and avoid the closed section of the A431 between Bath and Bristol.

Mothers resist government efforts to draft their children.

KIEV, Ukraine (PNN) - August 4, 2014 - The Ukrainian government is desperate for more men on the eastern front to fight the separatists. Ukrainian President Petro Poroshenko has announced yet a third round of general military mobilization, and draft orders are being delivered across Ukraine. Scores of young men from as far off as the Romanian border face conscription into the military and being sent to fight fellow Ukrainians in the east.

WUPPERTAL, Germany (PNN) - August 5, 2014 - When we last heard from German cyberpunk weapons hobbyist Patrick Priebe, he'd made a set of X-Men-inspired goggles that incorporated burning lasers. Sometime before that, however, he showed us a wrist-mounted, laser-sighted crossbow that he'd created. Now he's just completed a new-and-improved "semi-automatic" take on that crossbow.